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That’s What Friends Are For….

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All Righty my little snarkdoodles…

I know what you’re thinking…where have I been all week, what happened to Conversational Mondays, and Familial Fridays, where’s my weekly helping of Snark?!

Before the pitch forks come out, I apologize for not being able to give my two cents on all things snarky this week.

I am in the middle of a transition.

I will be starting a new job next week, and dying this week in San Fransisco, so maybe I won’t be starting a new job after all… Anyway while preparing my Last Will and Testament, and running around with the kiddos and overanalyzing a lot of everything else, I came up short on the posts this week, which I know is totally unforgivable, but I promise to do better, really…..

Luckily for me, I have some pretty cool friends, one of which wrote me a guest post for my poor neglected blog… so while I finish packing (don’t judge me), and worrying about everything I leave you with a guest post from a very good friend of mine, who’s topic on bitchy friends and forgiveness seems to come just at the right time since I done fucked up ya’ll (and was a total bitchy friend this week), but more on that later…

Should I return alive on Monday, I promise a post full of all the graphic details on how I almost died while running a marathon…….

Friends fight, friends come, friends go, and real friends know to apologize when things blow.  (Yes I felt the need to rhyme – I teach kindergarten for heaven’s sake!)   I knew that back in elementary school when one day Audra didn’t want to sit next to me at lunch anymore.  We got into a fight over this boy named James and Audra said she didn’t want to be friends with me anymore.  That is, until I won the science fair.  She nonchalantly came over to tell me I had a cool project and things were fine after that.  It was her way of saying, look, I did a bitchy thing, but I’m  over it now, are you??  I mean, because real apologies only happen in the movies – these are the kind of apologies that happen in the real world.  I knew that back in the day, and yet it’s still a hard pill to swallow as an adult if a friend stops being your friend.
I say this because I have been in the longest fight with one of my very dear friends for a long time now.  There was even a snarky blog about her and I admit, I loved reading it because it was true.  She did say a very bitchy comment.  And she’s a bitch.  But then again, so are a lot of my friends.  And that’s what I love about them.  Until she was a bitch to me.  It was great being on the friend side of the bitch.  It was horrible to be on the other side when you aren’t friends with a bitch that you cared about. 

Yes, I said care.  I’ve got a lot of feelings.  Too many feelings if there is such a thing.  I told myself, and to other people, she did a bitchy thing to me and I don’t care.  But deep down, I was really hurt.  She did do a bitchy thing.  I just don’t think she realized it was bitchy.  But I realized it and it hurt.  And I had to deal with it.  So while bitchy went about living her great life, I was ostracized and cut off from the circle.  It’s like no one wanted to sit with me at lunch.  Now, don’t get me wrong I have other great, equally bitchy friends.  But this particular bitch managed to make me feel as if the problem was me, which made me want to ostracize myself even more.
Now before I get too melancholy, I have to say, some really great things happened after I was ostracized.  I got in touch with a lot of older friends and it made me realize how many great people I have in my life.  I guess you can say, I finally got my nose out of the bitches ass to realize she was a bitch.  And I saw the light.  It didn’t make it any easier though.
That is, until I reached a point of an “aha” moment.  I started living my life not caring about the bitch.  I figured, if she wanted to end the friendship entirely, so be it.  She just wasn’t meant to be my friend then.  And truth be told, I got wayyyyy to damn busy at the moment to give a crap.  And  low and behold, as real life cycled again like  we were 7 year olds fighting over a boy at school, the bitch apologized to me.  It wasn’t your Blockbuster movie apology of I’m sorry.  In fact, I’m sorry was never uttered.  Bitches don’t say they are sorry.  But in between the lines of her email she sent this week, I was all too familiar with it.  Without saying it, she was owning up to being the bitch and saying she was in the wrong, and more importantly, that she missed me.  Now I am not saying I am back to sitting at lunch with her again, so to speak.  But it was what I needed. To know that one of life’s fucked up cycles of friendship happened. And as I made arrangements to see her this weekend, it made me realize, friends fight, friends come, friends go, and real friends apologize when things blow.  Ain’t friends a bitch.

Now enough of the “more you know” announcements with a shooting star going by.  This is real life bitches.  And I’ve gotta go brush my teeth, get dressed, and face the spirit rally at my elementary school.  (I’m jumping for joy.)  Here’s to all the bitches of the world – be nice to one another.  And say you are sorry when you should.  Us bitches gotta stick together.  We are a dying breed.


About sars! people with great stories to tell, anyone who will challenge my brain and not leave me feeling like I just sat through a two hour lecture on how to tie your shoe...

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